A NEW YEAR’S WISH FOR YOU
May you get a clean bill of health from your dentist, your cardiologist,
your gastro-endocrinologist, your urologist, your proctologist, your
podiatrist, your psychiatrist, your gynecologist, your plumber and the
IRS. May your hair, your teeth, your face-lift, your abs and your stocks
not fall; and may your blood pressure, your triglycerides, your
cholesterol, your white blood count and your mortgage interest not rise.
May you find a way to travel from anywhere to anywhere in the rush
hour in less than an hour, and when you get there may you find a parking
space. May Friday evening, December 31, find you seated around the
dinner table, together with your beloved family and cherished friends,
ushering in the New Year ahead. You will find the food better, the
environment quieter, the cost much cheaper, and the pleasure much more
fulfilling than anything else you might ordinarily do that night.
May you wake up on January 1st, finding that the world has not come to
an end, the lights work, the water faucets flow, and the sky has not
fallen. May you go to the bank on Monday morning, January 3rd and find
your account is in order, your money is still there and any mistakes are
in your favor.
May you ponder on January 4th; How did this ultramodern civilization of
ours manage to get itself traumatized by a possible slip of a blip on a
chip made out of sand.
May we relax about the future and realize that we still have a long long
time until we pass, by which time the computer is long since obsolete and
so are we.
May God give you the strength to go through a year of presidential
campaigning, and may some of the promises made be kept. May you believe
at least half of what the candidates propose, and may those elected fulfill
at least half of what they promise, and the miracles of reducing taxes and
balancing budgets happen.
May you be awe struck by God’s sense of humor as you think about the
possibility that a professional wrestler could become president of the
United States. May what you see in the mirror delight you, and what
others see in you delight them. May someone love you enough to forgive
your faults, be blind to your blemishes, and tell the world about your
May the telemarketers wait to make their sales calls until you finish
dinner, and may your checkbook and your budget balance, and may they
include generous amounts for charity. May you remember to say, “I love
you” at least once a day to your spouse, your child, your parents, your
friends; but not to your secretary, your nurse, your masseuse, your
hairdresser or your tennis instructor.